Psychological research suggests that people who are prone to anxiety and depression are most likely to struggle with ambiguity.
In the face of ambiguous situations, those who are anxious or depressed tend to think the worst and most threatening interpretations of the events. Unfortunately dating is a minefield of ambiguity and the threat of rejection is all too real for some Singlettes:
“Why didn’t he call?”
“Is he dating other people?”
“Does he really like me?”
“What should I do in this situatio...
We have all done it.... done something we feel was really stupid in the dating world and beat ourselves up for it. We drank too much and did things we regret. We spoke too much or too little. We didn’t say or do the right thing. We made ourselves vulnerable, showed our romantic interest, and then felt it wasn’t reciprocated.
In a classic example, a client described a slip whereby she accidentally referred to her date as her boyfriend in front of him. This relationship status was by...
One of the things I am always asked is ‘When should I contact him?’.
As in my post about the SMH article: ‘Are the rules redundant?’, my general advice is to contact him when you feel like it.
If you are excited about connecting with him, showing him that he is on your mind is not a bad thing, it is flattering! At worst, he will give you the impression that he doesn’t want to have contact as much as you do. If this lack of availability or disinterest continues, then this is VERY good in...
Thanks to one of my favourite singlettes who raised this very common question:
“Tell me – if you don’t want to respond to a guy’s advances in a kissing sense, by the second or third date, but you do enjoy hanging out with them, does that mean that you aren’t really attracted to them? … Should I not go on more dates with them?”
I believe we all bring all sorts of variation into each and every dating encounter we have. Our experience of any one date is influenced by all sorts of factors including:...
Ever wondered why some times you just ‘click’ with someone and other times the date just feels ‘off’, you don’t warm to him, or feel like you have much connection?
John and Julie Gottman are well renowned couples therapists and researchers, almost single-handedly responsible for most of the scientific reasearch on what makes a successful relationship. Although they mainly study established relationships, knowing what makes for a good relationship can be VERY useful for singles!
So, I have been asked about Tinder. Most of you will have heard of it, Tinder is a dating app, it links to your Facebook account and then, based on 5 pictures, mutual friends and shared interests and anything you want to write about yourself you get to ‘like’ or ‘nope’ the guys who come up within your age/location search criteria. If you like him and he likes you you get a match and then get to message each other.
This app is really good if you are a singlette with the following thought...